There is something that I struggle with, it is the thing that comes into my mind most days, and some days it plagues me to the core. Things that I try to do, situations that arise, and things left undone all remind me of one thing.... I am inadequate!
There have been so many times that I have a task that is looming over me, I've known that I needed to take care of it but I've been fearful that I am going to mess it up! So I wait until the last minute, I get all stressed out, I sweat, I worry, my eyes twitch, and my mouth gets dry. All because I fear the reality of proving to myself again that I am inadequate in every way!
I would read facebook and see what other moms were doing with their kids and think... I'm such a worthless mother. I would contact friends and know before I even pressed send that my friend would not contact me back... I don't matter to them. I would talk to friends and family who would dismiss what I said and move the conversation along... I'm so dumb. I would talk to God and tell him about what I desired for my life, and how I wanted to serve him and still I would think... He doesn't care about me, I'm not good enough!
Believing that I am worthless, don't matter, dumb, not good enough, all lead me to living a life of inadequacy. I was inadequate... not because that is what was true, but because I was living inadequate, I was breathing inadequate, and my feet were stuck in inadequate. In every thing that I did I was insecure. I would walk into a church meeting and immediately I would feel all the eyes of the people around me, judging me, telling me with their quarter smile that I'm not worth a thing. I would slip into a seat in the back with my two little boys, and be sitting there praying "Please God, please help them not to make any loud noises, or do anything besides sitting still and being good!" Because anything besides perfect behavior meant that I was "the worst" single mom in history!
Satan loves to use all these things, all of this discomfort, pain, and rotten thoughts to keep you from reaching the potential that God has for you, because He knows if He can keep you down and away from meeting with Jesus then you won't be able to do the amazing stuff that God has planned for you!
There have been so many times that I have a task that is looming over me, I've known that I needed to take care of it but I've been fearful that I am going to mess it up! So I wait until the last minute, I get all stressed out, I sweat, I worry, my eyes twitch, and my mouth gets dry. All because I fear the reality of proving to myself again that I am inadequate in every way!
I would read facebook and see what other moms were doing with their kids and think... I'm such a worthless mother. I would contact friends and know before I even pressed send that my friend would not contact me back... I don't matter to them. I would talk to friends and family who would dismiss what I said and move the conversation along... I'm so dumb. I would talk to God and tell him about what I desired for my life, and how I wanted to serve him and still I would think... He doesn't care about me, I'm not good enough!
Believing that I am worthless, don't matter, dumb, not good enough, all lead me to living a life of inadequacy. I was inadequate... not because that is what was true, but because I was living inadequate, I was breathing inadequate, and my feet were stuck in inadequate. In every thing that I did I was insecure. I would walk into a church meeting and immediately I would feel all the eyes of the people around me, judging me, telling me with their quarter smile that I'm not worth a thing. I would slip into a seat in the back with my two little boys, and be sitting there praying "Please God, please help them not to make any loud noises, or do anything besides sitting still and being good!" Because anything besides perfect behavior meant that I was "the worst" single mom in history!
Satan loves to use all these things, all of this discomfort, pain, and rotten thoughts to keep you from reaching the potential that God has for you, because He knows if He can keep you down and away from meeting with Jesus then you won't be able to do the amazing stuff that God has planned for you!
He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. John 8:44 b.
This past weekend my pastors wife spoke and she gave me new wisdom and insight on Satan in how she described him. Satan is: a liar, a thief, A coward, and a wimp! As soon as she said that it clicked in my mind that this is what we should be telling him whenever he tries to attack us! Stan loves to tell us all about how inadequate we are... "well guess what buddy, you're a total coward, and you're not going to talk to me like that because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Be gone!"
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:14
It's important to know and remember that God not only made you, but He loves you so very much that He sent Jesus to earth to die on a cross for you. When Jesus gave his life willingly on the cross he chose you. Jesus said you are worth so very much to me that I am willing to give my life so that I can have you be free from sin and live in heaven with me forever!
Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. Romans 5:7-8
You can see it very plainly, Jesus saw worth in us even when we were filled with sin! This is what we need to be filling our minds up with every single day! You are worth it, you are lovely, and he wants to spend eternity with you in heaven!
So next time you start thinking, I am totally worthless... don't just dismiss that thought, command that Satan leave you and then think about the fact that Jesus thinks so highly of you that He was willing to die the most brutal death just to have you!
Dear God, thank you for sending Jesus to earth to set us free from the bondage that keeps us from shining for you! Thank you Jesus for your loving sacrifice, and for being willing to give yourself so that we can live with you forever. You are such an amazing gift! I pray now that when we are feeling wothless, or inadequate father that we would take that and replace it with the truth that you so passionately demand we know... we are worth your life! :) Prompt us to remember that! Father let this post change someones life today, that they will forever rest in your arms. I love you Lord Jesus. In your name I pray. Amen.
So next time you start thinking, I am totally worthless... don't just dismiss that thought, command that Satan leave you and then think about the fact that Jesus thinks so highly of you that He was willing to die the most brutal death just to have you!
Dear God, thank you for sending Jesus to earth to set us free from the bondage that keeps us from shining for you! Thank you Jesus for your loving sacrifice, and for being willing to give yourself so that we can live with you forever. You are such an amazing gift! I pray now that when we are feeling wothless, or inadequate father that we would take that and replace it with the truth that you so passionately demand we know... we are worth your life! :) Prompt us to remember that! Father let this post change someones life today, that they will forever rest in your arms. I love you Lord Jesus. In your name I pray. Amen.